Sing-along time

Home>stories>Sing-along time

Back to glass casting later, ’cause over at Facebook we’re fracturing Christmas carols, and, in between wondering why anybody gives a rat’s patootie whether Tiger Woods is celibate, I’m adding my share.

Besides the classics (“Rudolf the Red-nosed Bandit” and “Jingle Bells, boy Santa Smells!”) I’ve so far added that much-beloved “Hark the Hairy Anglos Sing.” An old friend contributed “Eggplants We Have Heard on High.” And I just thought of this one:

O Christmas Brie, O Christmas Brie
You’re creamy-soft and stinky

O Christmas Brie, O Christmas Brie
I’d eat you on a Twinkie

My friends all say you go with fish
But on a twink, well, you’re delish

Oh Christmas Brie, O Christmas Brie
I’d eat you on a Twinkie

But my favorite actually wasn’t deliberate, it was the way I thought you were supposed to sing The Twelve Days of Christmas when I was a kid:

On the Thursday of Christmas
My true love gave to me
A parsnip in a bear tree

On the selling day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Two pearl gloves
And a parsnip in a bear tree

On the fur day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Three Frenchmen
Two pearl gloves
And a parsnip in a bear tree

On the Ford day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Four gummy bears
Three Frenchmen
Two pearl gloves
And a parsnip in a bear tree

On the fish day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Five goldurned drinks
Four gummy bears
Three Frenchmen
Two pearl gloves
And a parsnip in a bear tree

On the sex day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Six geezers praying
Five goldurned drinks
Four gummy bears
Three Frenchmen
Two pearl gloves
And a parsnip in a bear tree

On the stubborn day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Seven wands a-winning
Six geezers praying
Five goldurned drinks
Four gummy bears
Three Frenchmen
Two pearl gloves
And a parsnip in a bear tree

On the ate day of Christmas …

It got worse, believe me. So…anybody else got any songs they want to sing, now that we’re heading into the Thursday of Christmas?

2014-12-28T20:38:31+00:00

Comments welcome! (thanks)